Saturday, January 18, 2003

This suXor5. Hard. F*ck f*ck f*ckity f*ck.

Hey, Jim! F*ck him and the horse he rode in on. I, for one, will miss your online presence. Hurry back, would ya?
Be afraid; be very afraid. Mr.Lion points out that Microsoft makes the software that makes the BMW 745 run (or not run, as the case may be). Remember all those old jokes about having to stop the car, open and close the doors, and start up again? Here, again, we have life imitating comedy. Remind me to drive less often, huh?
Ummm ... holy crap! Lee, man, what the f*ck is happening to your erstwhile nation? The bobbies have been told not to investigate crimes such as burglary, vandalism, or assault. Do the gummint officials want more such crimes? That's the only possible result of such a policy. I am ... boggled.
Sometimes I do stuff that I know is just stupid. Today, I responded to a post by Tony Woodlief about his time working the Abortion Clinic detail for his local god-bothering collective. This was inordinately stupid for a couple of reasons:
  1. Nobody is ever convinced of anything by a short argument presented once
  2. There's no way to respond to his other commenters in an essay short enough that they'd be willing to read the whole thing
  3. There isn't anybody who hasn't already had their opinion on abortion solidified by now
  4. See item #1 repeatedly


Every now and then I forget my commitment not to try to educate anybody who isn't paying me for an education. People who don't want to learn new stuff generally don't. The only reliable way I've found to identify people who are open for instruction is that they'll offer cash money in trade.

I'll probably be able to resist responding to this kind of stuff for another six months at least, so I guess it wasn't a complete waste.

Thursday, January 16, 2003

Hello, Mr.Panthorn: I'm looking forward to watching you choke down that crow sandwich. Yummy!

Wednesday, January 15, 2003

Crap crap crappity crap.

Today, I spent several hours troubleshooting my network here. Currently, I get cable modem service from Adelphia (28 kilofeet from the CO is no place for DSL CPE), with a Netgear RT311 firewall/router. The Netgear, unfortunately, doesn't tunnel PPTP connections because it doesn't understand PPTP well enough, so I'm replacing it with a Cisco SOHO71 (same as the 806 with a four-port 10Mb switch). Ought to be a breeze, right?

Wrong. When I plug the cable modem directly into a Windows box and retrieve an IP address via DHCP, I get a real routable address with DNS options attached. When I plug the cable modem into the Netgear and retrieve an IP address via DHCP, I get a real routable address with DNS options attached; the same address, in fact.

When I plug the cable modem into the Cisco and retrieve an IP address via DHCP, I get a non-routable address with invalid DNS options attached. Turning up debug a bit shows that the DHCP server's IP address is on the same subnet as the IP address I would have otherwise retrieved myself.

That means that some brain-dead n00b on my cable segment is stupidly trying to serve DHCP over the WAN. Of course, there's no way to configure the Cisco to ignore some DHCPOFFER packets, so my only recourse is to wait for Adelphia tech support to get around to investigating the problem and doing, um, something. I suspect they're pretty much limited to disabling the culprit's cable modem and waiting for him to call so they can tell him he's violating the TOS.

In the meanwhile, I still can't PPTP and the Cisco, on which I spent quite a bit more of my hard-earned cash than I wanted to, just sits idle. I swear to <diety/>, I'm this close to breaking out the ol' NMAP to see if he's willing to let me shut him down myself. F*cking dork. If you're going to set up a server, then for f*ck's sake set it up correctly.
Finally! A slogan I can support: Celebrate Diversity!

Tuesday, January 14, 2003

It's the modern-day equivalent of bear-baiting, I tell you. Steven Den Beste writes 5000 words (plus another 17000 words worth of pictures) tweaking the Mac faithful and they respond. My question is: why?

Or to rephrase the question slightly, who cares what's on the business desktops? Companies that have specific software needs purchase the software they really need, and whatever hardware is appropriate to run it, and the decision is made in that order. Sure, there are lots of Intel chips running Windows on various desktops, but they're the red-headed stepchildren of the business world. If you're in the image manipulation business, your art-school dropouts have Macs. Sure, the MBAs in the front office have Windows so as to make those shiny PowerPoint presentations and to read the Word docs from the client, but the real guts of the business is on (as far as I can tell) Macs and the serious Unix hardware in the glass house.

When you're serious about performance, you go buy a Sun E10000 and run Oracle on it. They're both complicated products from companies with truly horrific pricing schemes, require a professional priesthood to sacrifice the goats at the right time, and provide lifetime employment for their cadre, but when you by-Gawd have to have the data available, that's where you have to go.

In modern post-pro houses, I'd bet the artists are probably running Maya, and the render farm is almost assuredly running Linux. Those guys don't seriously give a crap about the material on the desktop, which is why they can afford to let Windows in the building at all. If it was really a corporate asset, it'd be housed on a Unix box. Where do you think all those source code repositories live? Where is the actual rendering of the 425 FX shots for "Matrix Reloaded" taking place?

I'll give you a hint: it doesn't involve Redmond.

Monday, January 13, 2003

I'm super-delighted to point to my miniscule contribution to the world's stock of accumulated knowledge: begging Capitalist Lion to write stuff about video production. Woo-hoo!
Mindles H. Dreck fires a broadside at a British "friend" with delightful accuracy. Now, them's some fightin' words, there, boyeee. Woo-hoo!

Sunday, January 12, 2003

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is our brush with greatness. Mr. Simon walks in, graces us with his presence for a brief moment, and then he's gone, leaving only his timeless prose and a faint smell of cologne behind. Give it up for Laurence Simon, ladies and gentlemen! Hooray!



I would like to add that I don't hate Carrot Top, but I do (generally) hate people that hate Carrot Top. Does that mean we now have to duel with plastic grocery store paranoia bars? I'm game, I suppose.

(And now, a brief message from Laurence Simon of Amish Tech Support, who is appearing here as part of the Amish Tech Support 2003 Blog A Day Tour.)

I really don't have much of important to say today on the Tour. I don't even have anything overly hateful to say on this Full Of Hate site.

I do want to talk about a party, however.

We went to the birthday party of a friend's 4 year-old yesterday where Spider Man was the theme. My wife pronounces that Spider Man, and I pronounce that Spiderman, as in the Spidermans from Long Island who import hats.

Many parents were there, occasionally pointing at the roaming, rolling tide of small children. A costumed Spider Man (Spiderman) and Bat Man (Batman, of the Hamptons) were there entertaining the kids, too.

"Who are those guys really?" someone asked me.

"Don't tell the kids this," I said. "But they're Peter Parker and Bruce Wayne."


Most people know that it's futile to ask me question I can use as a straight line. Others still haven't learned yet. They suffer for my art.

Then there was this pair of Harry Potter glasses. Someone requested that I put those suckers on, see if they fit:

"Yeah, I know why the fifth book of the series is late. I've been away, you see. After my fourth year at Hogwarts, well, I kinda used my magic powers to blow up the Dursleys. The fat little bastard was getting on my nerves, I just couldn't take it anymore. Then I set Draco Malfoy on fire, his whole gang, and most of those kids in Slytherin, too. So I was shipped off to Magician Reform School, having a rough time of it. I wish Ron Weasley would return my calls, man, because I've got a great idea for a business when I get outta here. And Grainger... oh man, chicks dig scars.

Bah. Voldemort was right. Screw 'em all. Once I get a second-hand wand and a spellbook, my ass is outta here."


And then there was the Spider Man disk shooter. I was about to reach for it and make a comment about speeding up Catholic Mass by using one of those for firing out wafers and a Super Soaker full of sacramental wine when I realized...

This is what Carrot Top does.

I hate Carrot Top.

Everybody hates Carrot Top.

I went back to drinking my Bud Light and didn't play with another toy for the rest of the evening, reminiscing to the earlier part of the evening where I noticed that I enjoyed Snickers Ice Cream Bars better than actual Snickers Bars.

But I don't hate Snickers Bars like I hate Carrot Top.

(If you understood all of that, then you're a better man than I am, Gunga Din. However, it doesn't mean you can't also participate in the Amish Tech Support Blog A Day Tour... go to Laurence Simon's weblog and volunteer your site today!)